The Scammers Are At It Again - And I Wasn't Home...

The scammers are at it again. This time, it wasn't the scammers pretending to want to fix my computer; this time, it was about an impending lawsuit that the IRS is bringing against me. Too bad I wasn't home to take the call. But they did leave a voice mail message on my phone.

I usually try to remember to check for any voice mail when I get home. Sometimes I overlook it for a couple of hours, but I do end up eventually checking. This time, I noticed the flashing light on the base of the portable phone right away and knew there was a message.

Okay, ice cream put away in the freezer (I do have a few priorities), I checked the voicemail and heard (in a very heavy accent), "Yes, this is a very important message for you. We know that the IRS is attempting to bring an impending lawsuit against you. You may be to pay back very much money. Please call us back immediately, as we are able to assist you in this troubling, expensive matter..." The person leaving this important message then left a number so that I could call them back.

Isn't that sweet when someone wants to "assist you in this troubling, expensive matter"?

Yeah, right, I thought, wondering how this heavily accented, anonymous person knows that the IRS has an impending lawsuit against me, especially since I haven't received anything in writing from any official government agency in I-don't-know-how-long...In fact, the last thing I received from anyone from Washington, it was a couple of emails from my representatives in response to an email I'd sent them. (Probably an email addressing scammers, no doubt!)

So, I called the number. It rang and rang and rang and rang... At least I didn't get a recording telling me that this was not a working number, which I'd half-expected.

But finally, after about 20 or 30 rings (yes, I'm persistent, especially if I can harass a scammer), someone - or, rather, something - picked up. A heavily accented voice on their voicemail advised me to "kindly leave a message so that we can get back to you and assist you in your time of need."

Dang, I thought. I was so hoping for a live human being.

But since they wanted me to leave a message, I did. And here's the message I left: "Yes, leaver of important messages. It was so kind of you to call to offer assistance in an important matter. I just wish you had been available to take my call.

"In case you're wondering who this is leaving this message, rest assured that I am the reigning Queen Snarkmistress Supreme, of the Snark-castic queendom. I'm afraid I can't leave my number, since you already have it. I look forward to assisting you in your snarky time of kindness."

This was several hours ago. They have yet to call me back. I wonder if they will? I would have loved to have (snarkily) spoken with them...